Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Rain Messenger's Diary 12...Letter to Annie

Dear Annie,
I am not sure who you are or even, why I am writing this letter to you. The things that am going to tell you today may not even make sense to you. You are liable to think am crazy yet I want to tell you all this. Maybe, there are a few things that remain unsaid like a quiet veil around our lives. Or, maybe it’s just that I miss the habit of sharing my thoughts with someone like I once used to with a person sitting on a certain bench staring at clouds, broken stairways and rain…
I am not sure whether you will ever get to read this letter, for I do not know where or whom to send it to. So, I will just float it in the wind and maybe, it will find its way to you in the end. Things always do come home, you know, no matter how long it takes.
It’s been a while since I last wrote to you, so I am a bit rusty and I do not even know what to say. You know, they say, that life comes round in a complete circle, but what I like to believe is that it shapes up in mysterious ways, kind of like the random shapes the rocks get under the constant battering of the sea. They are all different, unintentionally shaped over hundreds of years, yet they all fit in as if they were all meant to be there.
There is always this dilemma when I write to you, a tug-of-war between whether to apologise for reasons I do not understand or tell you that none of it was my fault. I have come to learn that it is a bit of both.
It, however, suffices to say that you changed my life, maybe even saved it. It suffices to say that am sorry that my love was not strong enough to keep even God from pulling you away. Yet, there is this guitar and every tune I play reminds me of a certain balcony where you used to sing to me.
By now, perhaps you are wondering what the whole point is behind this meandering letter. As, I said, I do not know and when I post it today in the air of a virtual world, it will be a message and a prayer. A message that my yesterdays are still a part of my tomorrows but, that am slowly learning to choose between them and there soon maybe a day when I will choose my tomorrow free of my yesterday. It is a message that, when that day comes, it will not be an insult or me forgetting something, it will simply be me embracing sunrise again.
And, it is a prayer that you find peace with this letter and love. A love that can keep you safe and calm the tumultuous wind that keeps shattering things within us. It is a prayer that when you gaze into the horizon at the sunset, all you think of is that if the sunset is that beautiful, how beautiful the sunrise is going to be.

With all my love,
rain messenger

8 comments:

A GIFTED SISTER said...

i just got to see that u r in a maze
about which u urself dont know why u r thr
and what u feel

the usual feeling we have wen we are in the low state of our heart..the duration when we pretend we dont want love and care but certainly that is the time wen we need it the most....

u have annie for it and i have vibs for it..that is the only diff.but had it been a real human walking towards us to ensure he/she is there , it would have been soothing enough..
neways,all the best

Honeybee said...

Dear Annie,

Take care of my sweet friend. As he proceeds towards the light of life, let not a long shadow follow him. You've known him through thick-n-thin. He's now a more mr. mature, child as he is.

Take care.
With love from me too...

semanti said...

beautifully written in a sense of unpreparedness and dilemma............

Shilpi said...

my...such a profound billet doux...my heart skipped a beat...

ARiTRA said...

Nicely crafted words my friend.
Reading your words reminded me of one of Paulo Coelho's lines...
"a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing..."

Your words really reverberate the things present in the lines.... The joy of love, the melancholy of separation and the very cliche of human nature… confusion and contradiction.

Lastly, I wish both Annie and the Rain Messenger good luck in their future paths of life.

Gianna said...

This is a beautiful letter, open, raw and honest. Such qualities are rare these days.

Furr M. said...

so black an white blog! love it! im new here, i invate you to take a look to my blog! by now, i'm starting to follow you! hehe see ya! nice blog! congrats!

misterio said...

beautifully touching..pain and hope of a broken heart aptly painted in words